Shutting Down the Baby Factory

This has been a decision that has been a long time coming.

During my entire pregnancy, while carrying Hannah, I kept telling Chris, "This is it. I am done.  I am shutting down the baby factory after this girl comes out."  He blew me off, thinking it was hormones or something...and at that point, it very well might have been.

During my very difficult labor w/Hannah (and eventual c-section), the thought crossed my mind that, while they were digging around in my midsection, removing my uterus and all, they might as well go ahead and tie my tubes...but since Chris and I had not had a serious conversation about that kind of thing, I didn't push it.

Hannah has been a difficult crazy intense child and nearly three years later, here we are having the discussion...and we're ready.  I've set my appointment. I'm having my Mirena IUD removed on Tuesday and having my consultation about the Essure procedure afterwards.  If all goes as I expect it will, I'll be setting an appointment to get the procedure done ASAP.  (In the meantime, of course, we're not stupid.  We will take precautions in order to prevent a "surprise" from happening.)

Why now, you ask?  Hannah is less than three years old...the Mirena lasts five years.  Why not keep that bad boy in there until it has to come out and then do something.  My answer?  The Mirena has some side effects.  I am not positive that some of the changes I've noticed in myself over the past few years can positively be attributed to the Mirena, but my intuition tells me its a big possibility.  The constant headaches, the absentmindedness (its almost like I have Attention Deficit Disorder, y'all!), and the total lack of desire for...you know...all of it is listed as a possible side effect of have the Mirena.  Yes, I do love that my periods are way shorter and lighter, but its so not worth it when you factor in all the rest.  Chris has been complaining explaining that he feels like an afterthought most of the time, and for the first year or two after Hannah was born I just thought he was jealous of the kids 'cause they were taking up so much of my time and attention...or maybe he was just being a big ol' baby and needed to "man up" and see that this is just LIFE.  Kids need their moms and sometimes the dad just has to wait for his turn to be babied.

While maybe a tiny part of that might have been the case, for the most part he was right. I see it more clearly now than ever before, but I see now that he is SO RIGHT.  (Yes, Chris, you might want to print this out...Here I am, writing it out in black and white...YOU ARE RIGHT.)  With the way my hormones are so whacked out, I totally think my brain has gone haywire and my priorities have been really screwed up.  I can't wait to get this thing removed so I can (hopefully) purge these hormones from my system and feel more like myself again.  Hormonal birth control is not for me...pregnancy is not for me...my life is full and happy and COMPLETE.  There is nothing more I want from my life.  I am ready to shut down this part of my life and move on.  I'm actually kind of excited.