Don't get me wrong: I love my husband and I love my kids. Being a stay-at-home dad has been great for our family and we've been blessed to be able to afford one parent staying home with the kiddos, but it is wearing on him. This is definitely not Chris' "calling." He gets frustrated and wants to go back to work, and I hope he is able to do so very soon. I mess everything up as far as routines go (since they're used to having one parent in charge and now there's two...) so it causes a lot of conflict and "adjustment" and its just hard. The kids do better (and we get along so much better) when we have some time and space apart. I know for a fact I am a much better mommy and wife when I get out and get to do what I love. Maybe I need to line up a tutoring job or something. :)
So, anyway...Today has been ROUGH and I feel like my nerves are just shot. All day long I've felt like I've been on the edge of a knife and I've been struggling to keep it together all day long. Probably has something to do with the fact that our beloved kitty is so sick and its kinda like taking care of a newborn...sleepless nights and pure exhaustion. Oh, and I decided to try weaning myself from Zoloft this summer. Ha! I'll be taking some tonight, for sure.
I'm thinking maybe summer is NOT the time to test my ability to maintain my sanity without Zoloft. I feel much better, physically and emotionally, when I am working. Maybe I will try again once I get back in the swing of things. Only 18 more days until teachers go back for pre-planning! (Shut up, I know I'm nuts.)